One week down and besides resisting the chocolate Freddos at work, what have I done?
Well, looked at some websites, for a start, to see if I can get a grip of this weight loss challenge. It seems that half the entire world are in some way trying to loose weight, most of them in the United States. It did dawn on me at one point that if half the population of the USA, which according to the US Census is 307,052,399, swapped places with the most starving in Africa, which has at a rough guess a total population of 680,000,000, then all the world’s weight problems would be solved! I’ll mention it to Obama next time he calls (he and I are like THAT!).
If you distil all the information on all the pages (today on Google the words “weight loss tips” brought up 34,600,000 results) two things shine out above all the droll. While my search provided tips that were fast, successful, healthy, or easy, they all boil down to two things: Eat Less and Move More.
Yikes! Two of my most hated ideas!
A common thought amongst sites, especially the sensible ones that don’t involve pills or crazy diets, is to first write a food diary, listing everything you eat in one week. So I did that. I also listed what additional moving I did throughout the week. Considering that I have been eating healthier than normal, and watching portion control and all that sort of thing, I thought the results were interesting:
Saturday
Breakfast:
- None
Lunch:
- 600ml percolated coffee
Dinner:
- 2 pieces garlic bread
- large serve of garden/greek hybrid salad
- bottle red (shiraz)
- 1 gourmet pizza (mixed slices)
- 1 schooner Tooheys New White Stag (low-carb)
Exercise:
- I’m too polite to tell you.
Sunday
Breakfast:
- None
Lunch:
- 200ml percolated coffee
- 600ml lite milk
- 3 dim sims:
Dinner:
- Spag bol
Exercise:
- Got out of bed, didn’t I?
Monday
Breakfast:
- 200ml percolated coffee
Lunch:
- piece of home made honeycomb (num!)
- Large skim flat white T/A
- Spag bol
- herbal tea
Dinner:
- Roasted vegetables in balsamic vinegar and canola oil, being: brussels sprouts, chat potatoes, (head? stick?) cob of corn, red onions, and cherry tomatoes
- 400ml lite milk
Exercise:
- Took the stairs the 9 floors when I went and got the coffees. Walked home from the station past my normal stop (15 minutesish)
Tuesday
Breakfast:
- 200ml percolated coffee
- bread roll with peanut butter
Lunch:
- Large skim flat white T/A
- Spag bol
- herbal tea
- 1 banana
Dinner:
- 200g brussels sprouts roasted in balsamic vinegar… oh and 3 schooners of Blonde low carb beer
- 200ml lite milk
Exercise:
- Walked to and from the pub, didn’t I?
Wednesday
Breakfast:
- 200ml percolated coffee
- bread roll with peanut butter
Lunch:
- Large skim flat white T/A
- Spag bol
- herbal tea
- 2 bananas
Dinner:
- 3 dim sims
Exercise:
- Walked down the 9 floors twice. Walked home from work – that should count big time.
Thursday
Breakfast:
- 200ml percolated coffee
- Bowl cereal (a mix of sultana bran, all bran and honey wheat puffs with lite milk)
Lunch:
- Large skim flat white T/A
- Spag bol (last one thank Gods)
- herbal tea
- 2 bananas
Dinner:
- Chicken Kiev with 600ml mashed sweet potato and a large splash of pasta sauce mixed with extra hot chilli sauce
- 200ml lite milk
Exercise:
- Did the stairs twice at work. Fought the urge to go to the pub so all that resistance must count for something.
Friday
Breakfast:
- 200ml percolated coffee
- Bowl cereal
Lunch:
- 2 bananas
- Large skim flat white T/A
- herbal tea
- Subway footlong Pizza sub
Dinner:
- Crumbed fish with the sweet potato mash and sauce idea from yesterday (when you’re on a good thing…)
- A mug (that’s right – a mug) of nasty cask red
Exercise:
- Stairs
Throughout all this I was also drinking lots of water – straight from the tap at work (well, not STRAIGHT from the tap as that would unhygenic) and mixed with tropical punch cordial at home. I’m sure the cordial is screaming with sugars and kilojoules but I don’t care!
What I thought was interesting is that I’m not really eating a huge amount. The spag bol was probably the heaviest meal, everything else are chocked up with vegetables. I have made a huge effort to lay off the booze too, especially considering I’m going out tonight for a big one, but I worked out that even a low cal schooner is about 535 kilojoules. Considering the recommended kj intact for someone attempting weight loss is somewhere around the 7600kj mark, 14 schooners of low cal beer is your total collection for the day, or 11 full-cal beers (about 680kj each)! That’s pretty alarming, but it’s probably more alarming that I could seriously consider knocking over 14 beers in a night.
So, the Saturday Weigh In. I’ve had breakfast (200ml percolated coffee and a bananananana) and a shower, so let’s try out those scales: 86.3
Wow! That’s a whole kilogram less than last week. I’m on schedule and I’ve pretty much done nuffin!
Week 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 Sleaze 87.3 86.3This week I’ve signed up to a month long series of yoga classes. For the next month, every Wednesday and Friday morning, I’ll be Helloing the Sun or Stretching the Dog or whatever it is these macrobiotic people do. In all honesty I only chose the class for two very simple reasons: 1) It’s less than a block from my home; and 2) It gives you the opportunity to openly fart in public.
More on farting in my next usual blog entry.
Clyde
PS: You may have noticed I’m consuming a hella lot of coffee and bananas. There are very simple explanations for both. The coffee is because I bought myself an electric coffee percolator, which is one of the best little kitchen toys you can have, and the bananas is because partly it’s one of the only fruits I enjoy eating, but mostly of this little YouTube clip that has totally changed my life:
You’ll never eat a banana the same way again!
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